Have you ever felt like you and your spouse are running parallel lives? Welp, your not alone sis. Today, my husband, Alan, and I sat down to discuss the way we end and start the day together to stay united even when our days look exceptionally different.

Listen along to hear our answers to:

– What makes a morning routine beneficial?

– What has been the hardest thing about your morning routine?

– What challenges have you seen doing the morning routine together?

– Why do you do this together?

– What’s the biggest change between you two because of it?

– If you didn’t do a morning routine with my spouse, what could you do to start unifying in your daily rhythms?

Fill each other up this holiday season by starting the morning filling up your own cups alongside each other. Have fun with your accountability buddy, ya’ll!

We challenge you to sit down before Christmas and choose what 1 thing you can do in the morning to start the day together to fill your cups, decide, and act – together.

In 2020, what is your mini routine with your spouse going to be? Let’s go!

Welcome to the Soul Family LIVE Show & Podcast! I’m your host Sinikka & and if you haven’t heard our FREE 3-Day Forever I Choose You Devo is here! I created this 3-day digital devotional as a significant tool to walk you and your beloved through what these words mean to me, and serve as a tool to remind you and your beloved to continue to say, “Forever, I choose you.” Find it in the shop!

In other big news, Soul Creations Photography now officially offer Ministry Collections for anniversary, newborn, baby, maternity, and family sessions because WE are here for your forever!

Episode 12: How To Make The Most Of Your Morning With Your Spouse

Let’s GO!

Welcome to the Soul Family Podcast! I’m your host Sinikka & and this week we have a very special episode for you with my husband, Alan, as our guest of the hour. 

Ya’ll were extremely interested in finding out my morning routine, so last week I decided to share all about it and realized that sharing the full depth of it would only be possible with the person who I start the day with, so with that – let’s jump into it.

My husband and I first met in high school, it seemed destiny. Our last names both started with R and we both played French Horn. We also lived 3 minutes from each other and were both on the swim team. We then starting dating our junior year and continued dating as we journeyed together to study at IU Bloomington. We became engaged during our senior year and moved to Indianapolis to start new jobs in the city. After settling in Carmel, IN, I began a job in marketing and my husband began a job in accounting. 2 years later, I went full-time with photography, and a year after that, my husband changed careers to work in sales. Our lives look drastically different than when we first married almost 5 years ago, especially now that we have a 15-month-old toddler in our crew too!

We have had our fair share of lack of morning routines, and morning routine transitions. The first year of our baby’s life included early mornings and late nights that dug into my sleep schedule, introducing a new reality to me of reactionary living.

To be proactive, and not reactive, I decided I needed to change how I started my morning. I started a personal morning routine back in July in order to ensure I could have a little bit of control and get myself fully ready and dressed for the day before my baby woke up, since he was sleeping 11 hours around 8 months old (thank you, Jesus!!).

Two and a half months ago, my husband joined in the desire to have a morning routine because he had moved into a new field of work and wanted to be able to achieve ambitious results in his first year of sales. He realized that he needed to be intentional with time in order to make this happen and needed to start and do his day in a different way to get them.

At the end of this episode, we want you and your spouse to be able to have the keys in hands to create your own mini morning routine for 2020.

In the episode, we go through what we each do and why. Listen to the episode to get a full run-down, but here are the quick facts:

5:00am – Alan takes a cold shower to be fully alert

5:00am – Sinikka gets dressed & ready for the day and if Johnny is awake, she picks him up after she finishes this part of her morning routine – this is the most important part because he sometimes wakes up at random times throughout the morning depending on how he was sleeping. Babies have nightmares and other times have super poopy diapers, ya’ll!

5:10am – Alan reads scripture and writes in journal because it’s important, even if he doesn’t feel connected to the Lord that day, he is meeting Him in prayer and communicating to build relationship

5:20am – Alan goes to work out at apartment complex gym (weights / running) to steward his body well and take care of it

5:30am – Sinikka writes in Start Today Journal to focus her intentions and goals for how she wants to live life

5:30am – Sinikka journals and prays with Val Marie Paper Prayer Journal to build relationship with the Lord and center herself on what’s truly important

6:00am – Sinikka works out to be alert for the day and generate energy by expelling energy and doing hard things!

6:20am – Alan returns from work out and gets dressed & ready for the day

6:30am – Sinikka does a quick get ready one more time

6:45am – Sinikka reviews her personal goals and intentions for life from Brendon Bruchard’s High Performance Habits Workbook pages to refocus her heart on how she wants to show up for the day as a parent, spouse, leader, influencer, and photographer!

7:00am – Baby John David wakes up!

7:05am – Breakfast Time for everyone before Dad leaves & Mommy and Johnny morning learning time begins at 7:30am

Discussion Questions For Alan & Sinikka

• What makes a morning routine beneficial?

  • You feel in control right away. You feel fully alert and centered for whatever the day may throw your way. Also, you go into the day knowing and believing your time is valuable and using it intentionally.

• When did you start doing this together?

  • We started at the beginning of November. Prior to that, Sinikka was doing a mini morning routine when she awoke so that she had some time to herself before Johnny woke up.

• What has been the hardest thing about your morning routine?

  • The hardest thing is when we are sick and need the sleep, so we don’t wake up at our normal routine time OR when the other person doesn’t do the routine too. It makes it harder because your accountability buddy isn’t there smiling and encouraging you on!

• Why do you do this together?

  • When we do this together, we’re in it together. We end and start the day together, and it feels good to be united before the day begins.

• Biggest change between you two because of it?

  • I feel way more connected throughout the day because I know we got to do something good for ourselves – together – before the rest of the world woke up!

    – Sinikka

• If I didn’t do a morning routine with my spouse, what could I do to start unifying in our daily rhythms?

  • Just make sure you can find some rhythm time in your day to connect with your spouse, even if it’s in the evening after your both home. Create a routine around making dinner or winding down.

    – Alan

Ya’ll, we want you to start and end your day together – because it makes it more fun when you’re united doing something good for yourselves!

Fill each other up by filling up your own cups – alongside each other.

Also, we love this quote by Dave Ramsey and it really brings to light what we want to say about a morning routine with your spouse.

Live life no one else so you can live like no one else – Dave Ramsey

When I see this quote, I think about adding something uncommon to your daily routine or rhythm so that later on you will also experience the extremely good and beneficial results of that uncommon practice.

– Alan

When those around you are exhausted, lethargic, and foggy, you as a married couple will be able to help them because you will be a united front with a well-rested, alert, and in control mindset. You will be able to minister to those around you so much better because you will be clear on the fact that that is your mission – and you won’t be focused on “finding time to take a break or have personal time” because you already had it.  – Sinikka

It’s your turn, sis.

Reflection Questions: 

• What activities might we start doing in the morning that might help us feel most fully ready for the day?

• What activities might we stop doing in the morning that hinder us from feeling most fully ready for the day?

As a quick note, we highly recommend that you structure and schedule your morning routine time and fill it with the things you want to do, because then the things you want to stop doing aren’t even on your radar. It’s not a question of willpower at that point, it’s a question of priority. You take up your priorities in the morning.

For example, my husband and I wanted to stop scrolling on our phones, and with the morning routine we tend to not look at our phones until John David’s first nap and after my husband does the biggest thing for the day. Now THAT is an amazing habit 🙂

So, what is your mini routine with your spouse going to be? Sit down before Christmas and choose what 1 thing you can do in the morning to start the day together to fill your cups, decide, and act – together.

Friend, you’ve got this. Get out there and hug the person you chose to be with forever, and you have the opportunity to choose to care for yourselves right alongside each other. Hope you have an amazing week!

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